She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
