carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
