I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Nicole vs. Life
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize