Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Randomize
