Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
