Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
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