i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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