people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
