Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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