I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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