Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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