just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
