Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
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