Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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