scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
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