I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
