hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
