the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
