I bet he comes in French.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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