Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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