Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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