she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
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Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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