I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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