If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
birth control should be required to get into college
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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