he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I supernannyed him into submission
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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