he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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