I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
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