I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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