Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
