You work out of a Hotel?
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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