It's like a parade of train wrecks.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
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