do herpes really smell.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
