JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
