Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
