): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
