how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
