when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
