the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
we should paint friendship bongs
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