i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
How many fucks given?
0.12846
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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