In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Randomize
