you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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