sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Randomize
