if i can run in heels then i can drive
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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