he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize