Who did Billy Mays play for?
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
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I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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