wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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