ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
