I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
3pm strippers are depressing
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
