Christians are straight up FREAKS
She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
