Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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