I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
